Subject: Masters, Super Bowl, F1 Custom Packages!
Hi, I’m Robert Ewaniuk, President of SPORTALITY and Ticket Partners…
… and a douchebag spammer. Well, I added that last part but only because it’s true.
Over the past 15 years, I have attended and managed corporations at the Super Bowl, Masters and Formula 1 around the world. So when it comes to entertaining your clients at a major sporting event, there’s no one that has more experience than me! Tickets, hospitality or entry into parties, I have all the contacts and access to make anything happen.
Anything? How about a nude Miley Cyrus twerking my dog? And if you’re so successful, why do you have a second career as a bottom-feeding spammer? If you’ve got to spam total strangers, business doesn’t sound all that rosy. Actually, it’s kind of desperate … and pathetic.
Ah, now see what you’ve gone and done. I’m all teary-eyed at your company’s hardships.
I live by the following statement – “No, Never, Can’t! Those words are not in my vocabulary”.
And neither is spammer, obviously. But regarding your offer let me just say, “No, Never, Can’t!” I trust you’ll eventually figure that out once you mature enough to actually add simple words to your vocabulary.
From simple tickets to a complete managed [spam] program, large or small I have done it all.
Oh, I’m sure you have. There’s probably nothing too low for you since you are a spammer. It doesn’t get much lower than that.
I always pull thru for my clients making miracles and experiences that will last forever.
Miracles? So you’re Jesus Fucking Christ now? Settle down man. God will smite you where you stand assuming he can find you in the pile of manure you’ve excreted from your mouth.