Amused Atheist

If you're not an atheist, you're misguided

Half-baked Apples

Reality Check, 2014-02-06

The whole Adam and Eve story is one of the most ludicrous in the Bible, and that says a whole hell of a lot considering how bizarre that book is. I’m surprised that through all the generations of idiots who edited the Bible to remove things they didn’t like or add things they agreed with, that not one thought, “Ya know, the guy who first wrote this chapter was obviously high on khat so I think we should just quietly remove this nonsense.” Not. One.

But, if all the nonsense was removed from the Bible all that would be left would be the front and back cover.

Yet gullible Christians — yes, I know that’s redundant but I’m trying to make a point — believe this shit. Apparently, the god they worship is shown to be an asshole from the very beginning. “See that tree of the fruit of knowledge? Yeah, keep your grubby paws off of the fruit because the last thing I want as God is to have educated people because then I just cease to exist.”

That’s right, Christians. Just stop believing in God and — POOF! — he’s gone. You are more powerful than the god your ancestors created. Think about it. No, really, THINK about it.

Snake: D’you like apples?

Eve: Sure!

Snake: You just got kicked out of the garden of Eden & brought evil, suffering, and death into the world… How do ya like them apples?



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